Quantum Feary

If we all saw the world the same way, the way as it really is, we would experience nothing but energy, wavelengths and quantum particles in all places at once … and the sky would not be blue but a seething mass of supercharged ultraviolets and infrareds like some CGI creation by James Cameron … and objects would cease to be solid, all matter would be seamless and in chaotic juxtaposition.

Luckily, (because the truth is bigger than us) the enormity of the true universe is shrouded, blinkered, diffused, mellowed and filtered by eyes and ears and mouth and fingers and noses that block the enormity, the horror! of it all and leave little but sugared tea, and TV.

We seek truth, but when it stares us in the face, when it appears to us in night sweats, we pray for morning and the illusion of light. We weren't born to know all there is, it's not our genetic disposition ... we have not inherited this burden from our forebears but brought it upon ourselves ...

Since the age of enlightenment, when thinking disguised as science and philosophy became the filter of experience, the concept of thought as a progressive weapon of survival has dominated.

Yet rational thought is the enemy of zen, which favours the science of no mind, the urgent intuition. And new age gurus like Erkhart Tolle propose the Power of Now and the negation of thinking. After all, he says, thinking provokes anxiety about the future and regret about the past. We think in words, prose and verse. Aren't there too many words in this place?

I tried thinking in visions and the visions became dreams. The dreams were as real as the landscape from the kitchen window, once the soaps and bleach and the apidistra had been cleared from the sill. The hills ahead, the craggy chalk face of the mountain, the tall pines like soldiers, taller though still in awe, if we are honest, of the forest oaks in the valleys, the blue skies above laughing at its own deception, deceiving us with pure vibration in to believing that blue exists in the world … when there is nothing but waves of energy … the energy fields developing in our head are no more real than my dreams of an imaginary union that solves the puzzle, shatters stone, that is somehow eternal, in some way.